Working at Valleyfair

I've always wondered what it would be like to work at a roller coaster park. I've loved coasters my whole life, and in the back of my mind, it was always something I wanted to do. Finding myself unemployed during the summer, ​I saw that the local park was hiring for the end bit of the season, to replace all the college kids who were heading back off to school before the park closed. I knew I would be older than most of the employees, but especially at first, being 24 made me feel super old when almost everyone else there is between 16 and 22.

Oncoming riders! Welcome to Xtreme Swing! You may now enter by pushing on the gates in front of you. Loose articles such as hats, bags, glasses and flip-flops are not permitted on the ride and must be left with a non-rider or placed in the storage bins. Valleyfair is not responsible for items lost or damaged during the ride and you accept all responsibility for items left in the bin. Once seated, pull down the lap bar and fasten the belt. If you need assistance, please notify a loader to help you.

While I have been trained on more rides than Xtreme Swing (Minnesota River Valley Railroad, Monster (Octopus), Corkscrew (roller coaster)), it's the one where I spent most of my time. I literally dreamed about running the ride, over, and over, and over again, for many nights after getting off work.

Some things about working there were awesome!

• I got to test-ride each of the rides I worked on, including once while wearing kegel balls. I was paid to ride a ride while wearing kegel balls. Take that, bucket list!
• Kids between 48 and 52 inches tall are adorable
• People always ask me if Xtreme Swing is scary - I don't think so. Heck, my dad said it almost put him to sleep when he rode it! But I generally tell them that it depends on your perspective.

Working there, especially at first, was very hard, as I knew it would be. I was working over 50-hours some weeks, in the heat, constantly on my feet, walking as many as about 20 miles (rough estimate) back and forth around the platform all day. However, I got some *skills* I didn't quite expect

• By the end of the 3 weeks of full time work, I wasn't completely exhausted after a 13-hour shift on my feet in the sun
• I learned to shout over constantly loud noises (rides, music, people...)
• I developed the ability to recite scripts very very fast
• I can easily spot people wearing glasses, flip-flops or hats
• I can also easily notice people not wearing short skirts or pants over their swimsuits, as well as guys not wearing shirts (but I didn't need Valleyfair to teach me that)
• I learned all the highways that go around the southern metro (between traffic and road construction, I took a wide variety of routes)
• My shins got fairly bruise resistant as I was generally kicked on a daily basis by people who can't hold their feet still when they're hanging free
• I have gotten more tan than I have ever been before and my arm hair looks white against my skin

And of course, I learned some fun behind-the scenes bits:

• Redbox is Valleyfair code for "throw up" - try talking to a Valleyfair employee about red boxing
• The employee café called the Best Day Bistro serves the same food as in the parking except much cheaper
• Rotating positions is the key to avoiding boredom. Everyone pretty much knows at least 3-4 positions, most people tend to know a dozen or more. You generally rotate every hour or so. Apparently nobody just says the spiel all day like I'd originally thought.
• Everyone has a very distinct farmers tan with the V-neck from a polo shirt and shorts
• Apparently lifeguards have the most boring job
• The control booths are often air-conditioned to be freezing cold
• There's more to running the ride than pushing the go button, but not very much more
• Some people look really weird when they're riding rides. Xtreme Swing especially ranges from pure terror to boredom.

For the most part, experienced riders are the most pleasant, because they know what they're doing. However, even expert riders forget things sometimes. Here are some tips for novice riders and coaster junkies to keep in mind to make the days of the ride operators they interact with:

• If you can't figure out your harness, don't scream about it, or act confused or stupid. Just patiently wait for the ride operator to get to you to buckle it. You are not the only one who couldn't figure it out. Heck, only about 3/4 of people know how the harnesses work, and most of them have probably ridden the ride before.
• I don't know why anyone would wear their hair down to an amusement park. It's your choice, but it will get in your face and tangled.
• When you are told to put your hands up so we can check your restraint, don't expect us to think you're witty saying some remark in response. We've heard it all.
• When there is a grouper telling you where and how to sit, know how many people you are with and/or how and if you want to divide ahead of time, before being asked. It helps us so much you have no idea. Also, if you're riding alone, be alert for the grouper to call for a single rider. You will get on the ride faster, and make the grouper happy.
• If you're too fat/tall to ride, just realize it when you can't get the restraint to lock. We can't push extra hard to fit you in, so just recognize it and bow out. Nobody wins when we have to tell you you're too fat to ride.
• If you're too short (or with a kid who is too short), don't protest. Cedar Fair parks and likely other parks let kids get measured with a doctor style measurer. The kids can wear a wristband with their height, so the ride operator doesn't have to stress as much about comparing them to the height of a stick. Please get them measured, and don't have them try to get on rides they aren't tall enough for.
• Last but not least, LISTEN to the ride operator. While you don't HAVE to take your phone out of your pocket, believe us when we highly encourage you to not leave them in your basketball short pockets. We have seen them fall out. If glasses aren't allowed, either wear a strap or take them off without complaint. I know they won't fall off, but those are the rules, and I could get in trouble if you keep them on.
• Smile and waive at the ride operators as the train leaves the station, or we exit the platform. Sometimes that's all it takes to make our day.
• Don't make weird faces, etc. at the control booth while they are giving a spiel. It's probably fine for more experienced operators, but it sometimes doesn't take much for me to get distracted.